Pests of Modern Society

I have succeeded in weathering a wedding; the
ceremony, photo session and reception, from
two o’clock when the bridesmaids started dressing
till eleven when we finally left the still dancing bride
I cannot fathom why a wedding gives carte blanche
to a young woman to derange everyone, keep them
waiting at church, go for a two-hour long photo
session with bored guests forced to stand about
in high heels, forbidden to take their places until
the bride and her entourage return

Nice food dished out in minute amounts, background
music taken care of by DJ’s, the tone-deaf pests of
modern society; volume turned up until conversation
becomes impossible, distortion on loudspeakers
increasing until the frustration and anger makes life
unbearable for designated-drivers who cannot seek
solace in copious amounts of alcoholic beverages;
held prisoner until the inebriated family members
decide to go home

The lack of common sense and principle in this
tradition is beyond all comprehension, if the bride
wants to dress up in a special gown and get photos
taken she should do it the day before, I never willingly
attend a wedding; it is an overrated function designed
to test endurance and fortitude through sheer
effrontery – I’m only thankful I survived without
incurring the eternal wrath of the family…

This poem was written/submitted by Robert Smith.